Today, in apologies that aren’t actually apologies:

“For over 20 years, I have illustrated the absurd with absurdity, three hours a day, five days a week.  In this instance, I chose the wrong words in my analogy of the situation. I did not mean a personal attack on Ms. Fluke.

I think it is absolutely absurd that during these very serious political times, we are discussing personal sexual recreational activities before members of Congress. I personally do not agree that American citizens should pay for these social activities. What happened to personal responsibility and accountability? Where do we draw the line? If this is accepted as the norm, what will follow? Will we be debating if taxpayers should pay for new sneakers for all students that are interested in running to keep fit? In my monologue, I posited that it is not our business whatsoever to know what is going on in anyone’s bedroom nor do I think it is a topic that should reach a Presidential level.

My choice of words was not the best, and in the attempt to be humorous, I created a national stir. I sincerely apologize to Ms. Fluke for the insulting word choices.”

The truth of the matter is that Limbaugh is lying when he says that he sincerely apologizes for any of this.

Limbaugh is a professional speaker; he’s made millions of dollars by choosing words and saying them aloud. But now he wants us to believe that he chose these words improperly. For days. A momentary lapse of judgment? Sure. That’s possible. But to use the same words (that were chosen specifically to insult and degrade) over and over and over again … that’s not called choosing the wrong words. It’s pretty clear that he chose his words and he stuck to them for as long as he could, right up until it started to cost him money.

What’s more, in claiming that his word choice was insulting, Limbaugh continues to insult Fluke (and women more generally) by explicitly not apologizing for the sentiment behind the insulting words. In other words, his apology is that he expressed his opinion in a way that was so despicable that even some people who ordinarily like his opinions were offended.

He continues to think that Fluke is a slut and a prostitute; he just wishes he could come up with some other words that could express that opinion and that don’t bother so many people (and thus that won’t cost him money in the way that these poorly-chosen words cost him money).

And how do we know this? In the middle of his shoddy apology, Limbaugh doubles down on the sentiment behind the insult, emphasizing “personal responsibility and accountability” as his reasoning for his opposition to health care coverage for contraception. Fluke, then, is someone, Limbaugh continues to believe, who doesn’t care for “personal responsibility and accountability” when it comes to “personal sexual recreational activities.”

And what do we call such a woman? Well, Limbaugh is apparently still looking for the right words.